snapes demise

One Year Ago Tonight.....

One year ago today we were all together at Aeternitas – a Harry Potter Con run in part by The Group That Shall Not Be Named. One year ago today – my life changed.

At that point, I had recently recovered from the mistaken belief that I had been a Gryffindor. I had been going through a lot of life changes and was clearly confused. By the time we’d left for Aeternitas I had come to fully embrace the green – because by then I knew – I was a Slytherin.

There was still however the nagging problem of Bellatrix. I had been primarily cosplaying her since I’d joined the group. She felt right, but I couldn’t help but fee held back. Everyone else who embraced a character did so with a full and open heart. I didn’t feel a truly deep connection with her, though I tired.

We reached the con. One year ago today - I cosplayed Dobby. I was on a leash and lead around by friends who cosplayed the Malfoys. We all loved it. We laughed and took photos, but I was soon crimped by the fear of the photos of me reaching the Internet. Where I came from, I’d been crucified for far less. (More on that some other time.)

Later that day during a bout of depression in my hotel room brought on by the stupidity of pointless school policies – I came to understand the true nature of serpents. Not the monstrous beings recent cultures have made them out to be. They are healers, they are guardians. Graceful creatures completely in tune with the rhythms of the earth. They share bonds with the ancient mother goddesses of countless cultures.

One year ago tonight, I cosplayed Snape for what was only the second time. It was a weak Cosplay at best, I threw on a shoulder length wore black pants, a shirt and a black coat I wore normally. I already owned his wand, and yet I could not see it…

At that point I had been a Harry Potter fan for nearly a year. At that point I was still in denial over my true feelings for the character of Snape.

One year ago tonight, we all danced together during the Wrock show. The next thing we knew – we were all gathered together to watch Epic Win Burlesque.

The first girl danced to Rosemary Clooney. Hers was the dance of the sorting hat – she was a Slytherin. Another girl danced to Prince’s Kiss – hers was the dance of a Dementor. God Bless my beloved HP friends, they completely missed the joke – most of them aren’t as enamored with music as I am.

And then it happened. A girl portrayed Fawkes the Phoenix. Her music was Radiohead. I died. This was not just any Radiohead song – it was a song from OK Computer – it was “Climbing Up The Walls.” I was dying.

Finally the last set. Snape, and yes Harry. The song that played was so evocative and so fitting. Everyone was screaming – tears the emotion was so tangible, in a room full of women who were so free with their sexuality – people who were so free in all that they did when I had been repressed by my past.

After the performance, I ran back to my hotel room to freak out. I’d also been in love with, and suffering the effects of listing to the devastatingly beautiful Smashing Pumpkins record Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness. And yes, even though I was 15 when it was first released, I only listened to it for the first time last year. I opened the liner note after having seen a girl take off her clothes to climbing up the walls – after watching Snape and Harry a relationship that mirrored another I had been denying, I randomly opened the page to “Love.” The line I randomly read was, “Its what you needed to see.”

It was. As we drove home together, dreading the return to a world full of Muggles after having been in a place where we’d been supportive – I finally accepted it. I was not Bellatrix, - I was Snape, and I always had been. I began planning my costumes. I was consumed by the desire to write the story of his teenage years. With the help of a dear friend I tracked down the song that had played during the burlesque show – I had to know what it was – I was already in love.

“Come Here Boy,” by Imogen Heap. I downloaded nearly all of her songs, and put together a play list of Radiohead, Imogen Heap and a few other artists and began to write. I thought it would be a short two-week thing - just write his teenage years and be done with it. I am currently still writing – and will continue writing, cosplaying Snape and spending as much time with my HP family as I can. Because Aeternitas, TGTSNBN and The Epic Win Burlesque Show changed the way I look at life. And that is why, when I write and draw fan art, by name is Thom Heap.

'Minds Without Fear'

I haven't posted anything in a long time.... but at least I've been busy with some good things. I've drawn, sewn and written a lot. This is a video about my current favorite song to play while writing. Imogen Heap is an amazing artist:

Harry Potter - Anime opening

My Family

The Group That Shall Not Be Named. This was taken at our annual ice skating meetup.

Sh*t Potterheads Say

This is a really funny short video, made by my wonderful friends from The Group That Shall Not Be Named - NYC's Harry Potter Meetup Group... and somehow I ended up in it.

Greates Harry Potter Character of all Time: Severus Snape

This is devastating and beautiful at the same time.

Hogwarts Field Trip to the Natural History Museum

Last weekend, we all went for a field trip to the Natural History Museum. Wizards, witches, gem stones and dinosaurs...

Florence + The Machine - Shake It Out

I've recently fallen madly in love with Florence + The Machine. "Shake It Out" is such a great song to begin with, but add the beautiful imagery and the fantastic costumes in the video and it just makes me love Florence + The Machine that much more.

Snape Cosplay: Severus in his Seventh Year at Hogwarts

Teenage Snape. One of my early Snape Cosplays. This is also what I wore to the Deathly Hallows Pt 2 Midnight Premiere.





This how I saw Severus Snape in his Seventh Year at Hogwarts. These are the clothes he would have worn while he was becoming a Death Eater. They are meant to be better than he is used to having grown up poor in Spinners End, as these would have been given to him by his wealthy friends in Slytherin. There is a detailed origin story for the coat in my fic, "The Seprent Cycle: Severus" which I was writing at the time. I have a lot of very good memories from those early summer months...

Happy Birthday Severus Snape!

Puppet Snape is enjoying some adult water in honor of the anniversary of his birth.

Alan Rickman interview on Arts Leisure Weekend

Yesterday, the ladies and I attended Alan Rickman's talk at The Times Center. One of my good friends asked him if there was a character he connected with most, to which he gave an absolutely beautiful response.

After that we headed for Central Park for some Cosplay and Wizard Chess. The weather was lovely for January. It could have been spring.

Owl by Felting Dreams

I love this little owl. She comes from Felting Dreams on etsy along with many other adorable little creatures.

www.etsy.com/shop/feltingdreams

Snape Cosplay: Leaving the Sword of Gryffindor

This was one of my earlier cosplay efforts. I did this the last time The Group That Shall Not Be Named had an official Cosplay Day.

Snape + Lily - That Night (w. Deleted /Extra Scenes)

A friend was kind enough to share this with me. I'm not sure I'm ready to watch it myself however. We all saw the film multiple times together in the theater, but none of us can watch the thing on DVD, not yet, and certainly not alone.